Thursday, June 19, 2014

Turning 30

So here it is, the day before I'm turning 30!  I feel like 30 is a pretty big milestone... I mean, I know technically it's just another year, but I had so many expectations about turning 30, that are clearly not true.
1 year old me...I do believe I've accomplished a lot more since my first steps...
but that was a pretty big milestone to follow up!
It's not that I have any fear of growing older, or that I think 30 is anywhere near old.  However, I assumed your 20's were for figuring things out, for growing out of things and coming into adulthood.  Well here I am turning 30, and I haven't grown out of much except the clothes I had before I had kids, and anything I might have figured out is minimized by the realization of how much I really don't know.

I told a friend the other day that I thought by the time I was 30 I'd at least grow out of that 'forgetful' and 'clumsy' thing.   I said, "I guess I assumed I'd just magically become more responsible, less forgetful, and more organized", to which she replied that I'm just going to have to figure something else out for that.
Ok, so whatever, I didn't become magically less forgetful or anything.  I have however, gotten married, and had two kids that I've kept alive.   NOW we're talking responsibility! Pound Sign Boom!  
So I've decided rather than focus on all that magically didn't change before I hit the age that I wrongly assumed would make me a responsible, put together adult.  I'm going to focus on what I did learn in my 20's.

-I learned that marriage is about giving and teamwork.   It's not easy but it's it's the most rewarding work I've done yet.  
-I've learned that trusting God (in a lot of cases to provide- but also overall) is an ACTION, not just something that happens because you grew up Christian and know all the right verses.  Yet to be steadfast in that action, knowing the right verses makes all the difference.   I've had to look past circumstances and what I see, and know that God has great and mighty plans for us. 
Sometimes being in love with Ramen isn't so bad...

-Friendships are about a lot more than having fun with someone, and that you have to be purposeful about the types of people you want in your life.  A true friend speaks the hard truth you need to hear, yet shows grace with your faults and loves you past your shortcomings.  A true friendship brings glory to God.  A true friend is someone who you can pour your heart out to when you just need to vent.  A person who shares adventures, and makes you laugh.  There's a lot more I've learned about friendship, but I'm thankful for how Tyler and I have grown and been blessed with the friendships we have in our lives. 
A few of our friends we are blessed with... I found that mostly I have pictures of my kids...I should work on this.
-I've learned (ok maybe made more aware of and am still learning), it's not all about me.  

-I've learned life seems to work in seasons.  We've had seasons of growth, seasons of trials, seasons of peace... and to appreciate and learn in the season I'm in instead of trying to always get to the next one.

-Apparently, I'm not the only one who doesn't have life figured out...no one else really does either! We all have different experiences, and will up till the end... so I don't have to try to try to be this ideal person.  We gain different wisdom and perspectives and they're all valuable. 

-I have strong opinions, and other people have strong opinions as well.  That's ok, I don't have to try to change peoples minds, it's not worth sacrificing relationships or causing hurt.  I was even wrong one time.  

-Sometimes the right decision is not what I want to do...and I try to do it anyway, even when it seems like doing what's right is actually a terrible idea!  It seems to work out in the end.

-Any preconceived notions I had about being a mom flew out the window when I actually became a mom.  

That's all I got for now.  So I'm turning 30, and that's that.   
Actually my kids woke up, and I just gotta go :)