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I like that I decided to call my blog "rantings" of a tomboy mom, in that, it gives me the freedom to indeed rant.  In other words, this may or may not end as an entirely coherent thought, but rather just thoughts rolling out of my pregnant mind today, so they may not make sense at all!

I had an appointment with my midwife today, it was lovely.  We laughed, and talked, and discussed faith and of course, the baby.   In our discussions we talked about her journey in faith, it's a beautiful one, as they all are, and one she has recently shared in a very vulnerable way that left me in tears as I read it.  You can read her story here at her blog:   http://meanderingmidwife.blogspot.com/
We talked about her story a bit more today, and the struggles and joys that come along with new faith.  I left the office today reminded of God's amazing grace and love, yet convicted on how I share and live my own faith for others.  I kept thinking about how I live my life, how I share my 'testimony', how I show love, how do I serve...in short:  Do I live life in such a way that brings glory to God?   It's good to be reminded THAT is the whole point of things isn't it?

On another note from today, I keep getting these emails from my church.  Tyler and I have been attending this church for over a year, and have really enjoyed going, learning and worshiping.   Notice fellowship is not mentioned?  We haven't really gotten involved at all, I couldn't really tell you why.  It's a rather large church, so although we have gone for a year, we haven't met a single person because we are not involved in any of the small groups.  I volunteered in the nursery for two reasons, there was a need, and since I put my child in there, I felt as though I should help,  but also in small hopes to maybe meet people and feel connected.  Which didn't happen.   I'm not saying in any way this is the church's fault, there are many more opportunities to get involved, to join a small group and such, but Tyler and I have chosen to be part of a small group outside of our church where we grow in friendships and in our marriage.  So back to the emails... a couple months ago I sent an email to the lead nursery person to inform them of my upcoming due date and stepping down from volunteering for awhile until the baby is a bit older.  They emailed me back with thanks and congratulations, and then keep scheduling me. I simply hit the 'decline' button, give the reason of "having a baby" and continue on.  Yet I am just on the email list and keep geting scheduled, and receiving emails asking for help when they need it.   At this point I am starting to feel as though 'yes, I know there are a ton of volunteers and I'm just part of a mass email list, but it's starting to feel rubbed in that you never knew I actually existed and I never got to know a single one of you'.  Maybe it's pregnancy hormones, but it's getting annoying.   It's such a little silly thing, but I think it just kind of reminds me of how uninvolved we are... and makes me ponder how much that matters.  Like I said, we have a small group, so we have a community of sorts, and we really like our church.  It's worked well, but there is this 'family' thing of sorts that I grew up with in a church that I am missing.  Is it just something I got used to?  It's the things that come with being involved with a church you know?  I'm not 'asking' for anything here, but I know when I have this baby, no church is going to be bringing me meals, because one church doesn't know I exist, and the small group we are part of, we don't attend that church, those kinds of things.  I have friends and family who are providing lots and I'm not in need of anything... but every once in awhile I kind of miss that community thing.  I think Tyler and I are just going to have to eventually choose one church to be part of AND go to a small group with to be involved, but we really enjoy our set up now.

Next random thought, today I was extremely blessed by my parents as they paid to have someone clean my house for me.  Coming home to clean floors, a clean bathroom and a clean kitchen was a dream come true!  I love having and keeping a clean house, but it was getting very difficult to do anything down low, so seeing those clean bathroom floors and tub was a delight!  It's the little things I guess :)

Also, I can't get over how many people are voting for Vi on this competition thing... more thoughts on that next time I think.  But you all sure know how to make a girl feel loved!